Conversations around finances can be challenging to have in a romantic relationship. Part of the reason is that money is a very emotional subject in itself, albeit in a different way to romance. Conversations about money can unearth deep-rooted insecurities that we hold, and that can be difficult to deal with.
Regardless, it’s crucial to have these conversations. Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce worldwide. To help you avoid that, we’ll be looking at a list of topics you should discuss with your special other before tying the knot:
Do they want a joint account or separate accounts?
With the number of times this discussion shows up in social circles, it’s bound to come up with your partner at some point. The solution to this question relies as much on your preferences as it does on your partner’s.
While separate accounts allow you to maintain your individualities and keep a stash in case of abuse or other emergencies, joint accounts also have their uses. Joint accounts can help provide structure, especially family spending like buying a house, raising kids, etc.
Ultimately, the final solution may be to have a family joint account where you both make contributions, while retaining your individual accounts to cater to your personal needs.
Knowing your partner’s debt profile is vital as certain debts are merged after marriage. We’ve all heard stories of people getting married without disclosing their debts to their partners. After the marriage, they become responsible for their partner’s debt.
Having a lot of debt can also put families off making important life decisions like buying a home or having a child. Even low-paying debts like trust deeds can significantly affect your married life. Check out how deeds affect your marriage here: https://www.jubilee2000uk.org/scottish-debt-solutions/a-guide-to-scottish-trust-deeds-in-the-uk.html/
How do they view money?
Depending on your upbringing, you and your partner may have different perceptions about money. While they may be frugal budget planners, you may be a free-wheeling spender. That kind of mismatch in your approach to spending money can be problematic in the long run, especially if you share an account.
Understanding how your partner feels about concepts like saving, spending, and investing can help you both better plan for the future. You should also take time to evaluate your various backgrounds, and what subtle impact it might have had on your financial habits.
How often will you talk about money?
Your financial situation is never going to be stable, so you’ll have to plan regular reviews. Once you’ve broken the ice on finances, it should be easier to set a schedule to discuss finances.
Talking about finances will remain unromantic and weird for a while, especially if you have issues to deal with. However, those conversations are important and must be had. They help you figure out where you are financially, and what to do to get to where you want to be. A good rule of thumb is to schedule a talk every quarter.
Money issues might be the leading cause of divorce worldwide, but like other issues in relationships, constant communication is the way to solve them. The earlier you start having those difficult conversations with your partner, the higher the chances your union does well.
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